html xmlns:og='' xmlns:expr=''> Lounging at the Waldorf: The Armory


Thursday, June 14, 2012

The Armory

I've been in the same zip code for ten years and the area has changed so much around me. Where there were derelict  piers and warehouses, there are now high rise condos. Where there were corner delis, there are now shops with $300 tank tops. Where there was the bar that sold cocaine, there is now the bar that doesn't sell cocaine.

During this time of change, property value has skyrocketed which is great for landowners. As of this moment in time, I am not one of them. A landowner, that is. I would have bought years ago but it seems my bank account is filled with dream dollars and jelly doughnuts and no one accepts those as legal tender except for munchkins in The Land of Oz.

I used to huff and puff about the monied newcomers until someone introduced me like so:

"This is Raina. She is resentful of all the development on the waterfront."

I'm sorry, friend, what's that you're holding up to my face? A mirror? Why, that's strange. All I see is a bitter and twisted woman with her middle finger jutting straight to the sky.

So I took a few deep breaths, got a better attitude, and am now I'm seeing opportunities. Remember this picture from yesterday?

Here's a few more shots of the same building.

This is the Marcy Avenue Armory. It was built in 1884 atop the old Union Ground ballfield where these chaps used to play "base ball."

Eckford of Brooklyn Base Ball Club
The armory is 165,000 square feet, sits on 3 acres of land, and it's available. You read right. It's on the auction block courtesy of the state of New York. Here is a list of all the things I will do on this property once one of you nice readers gives me the moolah:

Plant a garden
Do yoga
Get drunk
Throw a prom were everything goes right
Host tutoring sessions for the neighborhood kids
Have daily activities with the seniors
Dance in my panties
Learn tightrope walking
Stage an opera
Build a ship
Build a robot dance troupe
Build a skateboard ramp for when my little brother comes to visit
Invite Marina Abramovic to come over and stare at me
Ice skate
Cross country ski
Say thank you.

I'm not kidding, friends. How do we do this?


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